Holy shit! What a way to wake up this Boxing Day morning.

I was deep in sleep, dreaming about me, Tata Young and Nong Nat jelly wrestling, when I suddenly awoke to what sounded like running water and plaster falling between the walls. I live 20 floors up in a 30-storey condo, and I thought that maybe an apartment above me had been flooded.

So I got up, turned on the light, but couldn’t see any water running down the walls. Then the floor in my apartment began to shake and sway quite heavily, as an eerie moan from shrieking concrete reverberated through the building for over two minutes. Surely what I’d flushed down the toilet from last nights’ gang-keo-wan (green curry) couldn’t have caused that much damage?

Now right beside my condo are two high-rise construction works. My first thought was that having never experienced an earthquake before, something had gone terribly wrong next door at the construction site. A quick look out the window confirmed that something was definitely wrong as hundreds of construction workers poured onto the street and looked up, pointing at the towers.

I stood half-naked, huddled in the doorway of the bathroom (that’s what you’re supposed to do, right?) while I tried to figure out what the fuck was going on. Was I simply hungover and dizzy, or was the rocking sensation and the strange noises a sign of some impending disaster. After spending more than two minutes doing an impromptu impersonation of Captain Kirk when the Enterprise got broadsided, I decided it was time to move.

Throwing on my clothes with phone and passport in hand, I ran the 20 sets of stairs to the ground. Much confusion followed for an hour as everybody stood and stared or pointed at the buildings. It was somewhat amusing to see quite a few farangs milling about outside trying to distance themselves in public from their bleary-eyed half-naked “rent-a-girlfriends” brought home from the night before.

Eventually news filtered through that it was indeed the aftershock from a massive earthquake off the coast of Indonesia, and that it was safe to go back inside. So after another highly enjoyable stroll back up 20 flights of stairs, I was able to shower and get ready for work, then another 20 flights of stairs back down onto the street where I made my way to the office.

Hopefully my apartment will still be standing when I get home this afternooon. I also hope those bloody lifts are working!

News just in – apparently this earthquake ranks as one of the ten biggest of the last 100 years, a mighty 8.5 on the richter scale! The beaches in the south of Thailand have been hit with large tidal waves, with a fair amount of damage as well. Let’s hope there’s not been too many casualties.